My Wicked Sense of Humor

I come by my wicked sense of humor honestly... both my parents are hilarious, in very different ways. My mother gave me my sense of irreverence. In the '80s there were these bumper stickers that were very popular: "My [ex-husband, ex-wife, boss, etc] is in the trunk." She wanted to get one and then attach one of these to the trunk:

From that point forward, she created a monster. If I ever offend you accidentally, know that I meant you no harm. If you are still offended knowing that, your loss.

The metaphor of the walking mandala

Today was the first beautiful weather day in what feels like forever. I moved to Atlanta with the hopes of escaping weather that increases my Lyme related pain but my hopes have been dashed this particular winter. As I try to not squander an opportunity, I chose to take some time for myself and walk the mandala behind my health practitioner’s office. It occurs to me that the process of walking a labyrinth is a great metaphor for life:

We go out to go in and in to go out, backwards to go forwards.
 We follow a path, walking on blue slate chips which can be warm in the sun or cool in the shade. If we choose to walk on them barefoot, they can be smooth and pleasing or jagged and even painful.
 Alternatively, we can protect ourselves (via shoes). You go all the way in to (pause and then) turn around and go out the very same way, yet the scenery looks quite different on the way out. Things change depending on your perspective: you might not see the dragonfly on the blue globe close up but it was so easy to spot from a distance.
 

We can take time to smell the sweet flowers. We can choose to follow etiquette but shouln't be afraid to break it either.
 Mindfulness of the moment, yet clarity of past and future.
 Remember to have joy in the moment- never take yourself too seriously. Stop and observe the flora & fauna, but be careful to not disturb them. It's the relation between stillness and movement.
 

“Labyrinths are one of the oldest transformational tools known to mankind. They have been used for centuries for prayer, ritual, initiation, and personal and spiritual growth. Unlike a maze, a labyrinth is unicursal- only one way to the center and back out again. Once you set your foot on the path, you are gently guided to the center of the labyrinth and yourself. There are no obstacles, no dead ends, and no tricks. So- with the labyrinth walker it is a meditative process- the mind can be stilled and attention paid to the body. It is a time of being rather than doing. Labyrinths also help us access our intuition and creativity, integrate body and spirit, listen to our heart, connect to the greater universal flow of energy, and deepen our spirituality.” (HealthSpring Holistic Center)

Sometimes you have to make room...

My husband and I are in the process of trying to make all of our stuff fit into a condo that really only fits one person comfortably (or two if they do not have a lot of stuff, such as 5 bajillion* books). Since Jeff and I have more books between the two of us than the average small town community library, one of the things we are attempting is to pare down is our books.

Both my husband and I are learning disabled and came to reading late. Each of us has that special book that broke through the barrier and helped us gain the ability to read without tremendous effort. For Jeff that book is The Hobbit.

We have the fancy binding edition of the Tolkien trilogy and Jeff was going to sell his original mass market print editions. As he was getting ready to put it in the "to go" pile, he shared his story of the breakthrough, of how his mother, despite money being tight, rushed out to purchase her son these books that he was excited to read. Although Jeff would probably deny this, I could hear the lump in his throat as he told me about the moment when he finally was able to read at his grade level. The books that he held in hand were the exact books responsible.

Knowing the pain of struggling to do something that your heart calls so strongly to do (both of us come from families of voracious readers) and the elation of finally breaking through, I immediately told him to put the books back on the shelf, that we could make room for such influential books.


*yes, I made that word up.

I'd never go back to high school.

It seems that so many people fantasize about returning to their glory days of high school. You couldn't pay me enough money to return to that hell. However, I would love to return to a freshman year of college experience. 

We are currently touring Georgia State University looking at their neuroscience graduate program. Today's tour is for the general university so I'm getting a good overview of the undergrad program. I. am. so. envious. What I would give to be an incoming freshman student.

Yes, I'm a geek.

The presence of God?

I regularly ponder the presence of God in our daily lives. I am troubled by the issue of free will vis a vis omnipresence. An Islamic Imam posed one possible explanation: that life is like an improv play- God sets the stage, gives general direction, and will yell "Cut!" when your scene is done; how you choose to get through your scene is up to you.

This is what I was wearing when

James prayed that God had no

hand in selecting the outfit.

Yet, this leaves me wondering- how present is God in my life? I have no doubt that it was Providence that has guided me here to Atlanta, but does God care whether I get stuck in traffic or not?

In seminary we have very deep conversations in a very lighthearted way. While at a Tacky Christmas Sweater Party with my classmates, we were debating the issue of Providence. I was up on my metaphorical soapbox, passionately debating both sides of the argument, when I asked, "does God really care what I wear?" Without missing a beat, my friend James retorts, "with what you're wearing, I certainly hope not."

I would love to hear your thoughts. How present is God in your life? Where do you fall on the issue of Providence?

A prayer we can all relate to...

From St. Teresa of Avila:

Lord,
Thou knowest better than I myself
that I am growing older and will someday be old.
Keep me from fatal habit of thinking
I must say something on every subject and on every occasion.

Release me from craving to
straighten out everybody's affairs.

Make me thoughtful but not moody;
helpful but not bossy.

With my vast store of wisdom,
it seems a pity not to use it all;
but Thou knowest, Lord,
that I want a few friends at the end.
Keep my mind free from the recital of endless details;
give me wings to get to the point.

Seal my lips on my aches and pains;
they are increasing, and love of rehearsing them
is becoming sweeter as the years go by.

I dare not ask for improved memory,
but for a growing humility and a lessening cock-sureness
when my memory seems to clash with the memories of others.
Teach me the glorious lesson that occasionally I may be mistaken.

Keep me reasonably sweet, for a sour old person
is one of the crowning works of the devil.

An Interpretive Alternative to The Lord's Prayer

New Zealand Maori Prayer

Prayer at Night’s Approaching

Life-giver, Pain-bearer, Love-maker,

Source of all that is and that shall be,

Father and Mother of us all,

Loving God, in whom is heaven:

The hallowing of your name echo through the universe!

The way of your justice be followed by the peoples of the world!

Your heavenly will be done by all created beings!

Your commonwealth of peace and freedom

sustain our hope and come on earth.

With the bread we need for today, feed us.

In the hurts we absorb from one another, forgive us.

In times of temptation and test, strengthen us.

From trials too great to endure, spare us.

From the grip of all that is evil, free us.

For you reign in the glory of the power that is love,

now and for ever. Amen.

a New Zealand Maori prayer, interpreting The Lord’s Prayer  from http://www.amazon.com/Prayer-Nights-Approaching-Jim-Cotter/dp/1870652274/ref=sr_1_3?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1361229010&sr=1-3&keywords=Jim+Cotter

I originally posted this on my Tumblr account but realized that it belonged here.

While we sleep...

It occurs to me that while we sleep:

Teddy bears guard us from monsters.


Cats guard us from spirits/ghosts.


And dogs guard us (hopefully) from real life threats.

The Greatest Birthday Gift to Myself, Ever!

When I first started at Candler, I was barely able to make it from the parking lot to the classroom and only rarely had the strength to make it up the stairs to Cannon Chapel. On my 41st birthday I was able to make it from the 4th floor of the Theology building, down the stairs, through campus, all the way to Emory Village to pick up lunch... and back... in under 30 minutes! I could not ask for a better birthday gift to myself!!

I have come a long way since I first fell ill with Lyme disease: rebuilding my life from being bedridden and abandoned to a new life that includes graduate school and love. I worked very hard to get to this place and must continue in my vigilance. Through all the tears and pain, I persevered. I will continue to persevere with love, strength, and gratitude bolstering me.

Pondering Hermeneutics and Dog Training

I am currently taking an anthropology class exploring world Christianities. We began the semester by examining the terms we will use throughout the semester: meaning, belief, faith. One article we read actually explored "the meaning of meaning". Is your head spinning yet? Mine certainly is.

Barron

 

I must confess that I am a terrible dog trainer. My dog is housebroken but that is about the limit of his training. As I was pondering this new hermeneutical lexicon while walking my dog Barron, it occurred to me that this might be why I fail at training my dog. Specifically: when I tell Barron "Up!" it could mean "go up the stairs", "jump into my lap", "stand up so I can reach your collar"... well, you get the idea. How is Barron to know the meaning of "Up."? How am I to know the meaning of "meaning"?

These are the things that an over-educated graduate student ponders...

Lyme and a career path?

If all goes as planned, a year from now I will be done with school and will being working, hopefully full-time. This prospect scares the crap out of me. Not because work scares me but because my Lyme scares me. I do not make commitments that I can't keep. This makes committing to a full time job challenging. What can I do that matches my skill set but allows me flexibility for when my Lyme flares? I am a writer but I need structure, so writing from home would not work... not to mention the fact that I know the likelihood of making a reasonable living writing is as likely as winning the lotto: every one dreams big but few actually win. I could teach but that requires me being able to make it to every class, which we know I am unable to do.

How do other Lymies support themselves? How do you pay your exorbitant medical bills?

An Ethic of Responsibility: The Estate Tax Debate

There are some that believe that we should sell our possessions and become homeless ourselves; Jesus himself calls for us to sell our possessions and follow him (Mk 10:21; Lk 12:33; 18:22; Mt 19:21) but I know that money equates to power and the ability to be heard within society. Chuck Collins is an example of one that takes the ethic of responsibility further than I feel comfortable with, yet he was able to maintain his power, voice, and influence.

Chuck Collins, the great-grandson of Oscar Mayer and a Unitarian Universalist, at the ripe age of 26 gave the entirety of his birthright “to foundations and groups that he knew needed funding”[1] believing it to be an important step on his journey towards creating a more just society. An article from 2003 covers his defense of the Estate Tax by starting with his early life experience, the source of his authority. Discussing his early life experience working in disadvantaged communities, such as Appalachia, we see how Collins arrived at the decision to give away his inheritance. Collins is a “radical meritocratist”[2], operating out of a responsibility ethic, who believes that each generation should start out fresh instead of inheritance allowing those of less quality to end up in positions of power based solely on the merits of their forefathers.

The Next Generation: Think For Yourself

Will the next generation need machines to make their decisions?

I fear for the world we are creating. But more than that, I fear for the generation that will inherit it. We have systematically removed the ability to think for one's self. We are failing at preparing our children to become self-sufficient. When their parents are no longer around to think for them, to make decisions for them what will happen? Interestingly, there is apparently no antonym for "prepare", yet that is what we are doing: the opposite of preparing the next generation. We are systematically removing the ability to think for one's self.

The Republican party is supposed to be about limiting government control yet the apparently "new and improved" GOP wants to control all of our intimate life decisions. They regulate personal safety issues (such as requiring wearing motorcycle helmets or seat belts) and control a woman's ability to make decisions for her own body. It seems to me they are about letting corporations run free while forcing individuals to subjugate individual freedom of choice.

If we teach children how to achieve high test scores instead of how to figure out the answers, what are we really teaching them? Are we preparing them for adulthood? If we regulate all personal safety decisions (i.e. whether or not to wear a bicycle helmet) how are we teaching them to make wise decisions as they grow up?

I am not a conspiracy theorist (although conspiratorial thoughts do flash through my brain occasionally) I do not believe that there is some great conspiracy to create an inept generation. Yet that seems to me what is happening.

The O.S. Bond

Trying to explain the bond that O.S. girls have is a difficult task, it is abstruse in nature.  The closest analogy I can come up with is a sorority, but that does not even do it justice. We grew up together, in close quarters, surviving our most formidable and often challenging years as unit. Our bond is forged by the heat that is teenaged girls evolving together and that is one that cannot be broken.

My fiance was asking about my wedding guests, some of my fellow O.S. girls, and he asked, "when was the last time you saw her?" What he fails to understand is that it does not matter how long we have been separated, or even if we knew each other in high school--an Oldfields girl will always accept another one with open arms.

My dear friend Sarah Greenhalgh graduated seven years ahead of me. The fact that we were not on campus at the same time did not diminish the bond we felt. At her funeral, her classmates welcomed me with open arms, even though I was eight years their junior. It did not matter at all- we are Oldfields girls and we were hurting. We equally lifted our grief and mourned together, as equals.

Oldfields girls have a bond that transcends time and distance- once we are reunited, it as if we were never separated; all that is required is to catch up on the details.

OneUSA

My brilliant friend, John Hawks, came up with an amazing idea- that we the citizens, regardless of political affiliations or leanings, join together to change our broken system.

The way our system stands now, corruption is rampant. As a political science major, I have given much thought to how we, as a country, could fix this system. Sadly, I focused more on political theory than on practical politics in under-grad, so my thoughts tended towards the non-helpful area. However, some ideas that others have come up with that I thought had promise are: getting rid of the primary system and switching our presidential election to a run-off system (thereby giving 3rd parties a shot at winning); of course campaign finance reform (talk about a pipe dream!); and/or term limits. But all of these require, literally, an act of congress.

But John came up with such a brilliant idea that can implemented immediately, without legislation or the polis standing out in the cold or rain holding signs. Taken from his Facebook group "About" page:

This group will attempt to find a civil common ground we can all support. The initial premise is, that while Romney & Obama generated heated factions amongst us, we CAN come together on working to get the idiotic morons out of Congress. OneUSA believes there are four ways to identify a MORON IN CONGRESS:

1. If they ALWAYS vote party lines, they are not Voting for the USA....they are voting only for their Party.....They are MORONS
2. If they won't listen to the other arguments in a civil way, then negotiate and finally compromise....They are MORONS
3. If they claim they want smaller Government except they want Government in control of a Woman's Body......They are MORONS
4. If they manipulate the truth, fail to reveal the truth or lie......They are MORONS.

Help us to develop techniques to recognize MORONIC CONGRESSMEN and CONGRESSWOMEN.

Help us point them out to others as MORONS who need to, at least leave Congress if not our OneUSA!!

If we ALL commit to voting these "morons" out of office, things will change. Will we end up with someone who aligns with us socio-politically? Probably not. However, if everyone agrees to vote out those who only vote their party lines, who refuse to except reason or to compromise, who obfuscate the truth, or who generally act like morons, and we do this regardless of our political affiliations, then the politicians will finally realize who they are truly beholden to: the citizens of the United States of America. If politicians become more driven by fear of not being reelected than by their lust for power, then we finally stand a chance of beating back the plutocracy and reclaiming our country as OURS.

Will you join the movement? Will you commit to stand for truth and against hypocrisy where possible. Come join us in our search for the truth and share accurate information when we find it! OneUSA [https://www.facebook.com/groups/102500953234489/ ]